As I’ve said before, I’m a second-career student at Princeton Seminary.\u00a0 My undergraduate degree is in Computer Science, and I spent 20 years (more or less) working in Information Technology in various capacities.\u00a0 A few years back after a few prior years of wondering whether I belonged in corporate America and in IT, I experienced a layoff.\u00a0 That caused me to spend some time thinking about my future, and I decided that some form of ministry was my future.\u00a0 I’m in my second year at Princeton Seminary.\u00a0 I’ve had one very successful summer serving as a Chaplain intern, and I’m interning in a church right now.<\/p>\n
One of the things that we are reminded of, often, regularly, all the time, is that we who are in seminary (and the ordination process) are discerning our call and vocation.\u00a0 We are taught that serving the church in some form (pastor, chaplain, seminary staff, etc) are a few possible vocations, but that God calls many people to a “secular” vocation.\u00a0 In that secular vocation, people are called to do their secular job while living their Christian identity.\u00a0 Hardly a week goes by without someone asking us what our sense of call is.\u00a0 I felt a strong call to chaplaincy this summer, and I’m exploring my sense of call to congregational ministry in my current Field Ed placement.<\/p>\n
For the first half of the serious discernment about going to seminary, I was also looking for a job in my first career.\u00a0 Many people had told me that discernment is better as a choice between two options, rather than a yes\/no choice of one option.\u00a0 There were a few times before I made the decision that I needed to seriously look at seminary when I almost was chosen for a job.\u00a0 I feel that these were God’s way of nudging or shoving me to seminary.\u00a0 The last was a position as a project manager at a local community college, that I missed by “this much” according to someone at the college.\u00a0 That was really the final straw that pushed me to seminary.\u00a0 Interestingly, about a year later (after I’d been accepted, while I was waiting for the fall semester) I got a call back from that college asking if I might be interested in interviewing again for the position – it was open once more.\u00a0\u00a0 I refused immediately – I had already decided on a different path.<\/p>\n
Recently, school has been taking most of my time.\u00a0 For some reason, this middler year at Princeton, with Princeton’s new schedule and Field Ed is requiring a LOT of my time.\u00a0 At the same time, I’ve been offered the chance to work on several small IT projects – some web development, some email migration, some “fix my computer” work.\u00a0 I’ve had to turn down a few and make sure that the rest understand that I’m very busy with school and not as available as I have been in the past (particularly the year before school started).<\/p>\n
At the same time, there’s a temptation.\u00a0 The IT work is easy for me, compared to my seminary work.\u00a0 There’s a reason for that … I have years of experience in IT and only a small amount of experience in seminary.\u00a0 I’m doing a lot of “first time I’ve done this” at seminary and in my internships.\u00a0 When a friend needed a quick blog installation last summer, I was able to get a framework installed in an hour – domain name and all.\u00a0 It has taken me more time than that to write a few prayers for Field Ed (it’s faster now).\u00a0 So there’s a temptation to say – “I can DO my first job, why don’t I stop school and go back?”<\/p>\n
In the stressed student, this creates a few mental options for what is happening: I’ve tended to see these recent requests in light of option 3, after spending a little time flipping back and forth between 1 and 2.\u00a0 In between flash cards and readings and writing papers, of course.<\/p>\n I believe that in my case, option 4 is the most likely.\u00a0 Why would God call someone this late in life and just throw away all of the skills and experience that were built over those years?\u00a0 At every church that I’ve interacted with, I’ve used my IT skills.\u00a0 Right now I’m scheduled to be the computer\/projector guy on Sunday at Field Ed, and I’m working on converting the church’s email to Google.\u00a0 But those aren’t the skills that give me life.\u00a0 Helping people understand God and the message of Christ, helping them process grief or loss or celebration, helping them to worship God – those are the things that are giving me life.\u00a0 The IT job is fun at times – don’t get me wrong.\u00a0 But right now I just can’t see doing it full-time again.\u00a0 I can see ministry in some form being my future full-time – with a little project management and a little IT work in the mix.<\/p>\n And yet, it’s tempting to look back.\u00a0 So I must turn my head and look forward again.
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