BREAKING NEWS: PC(USA) Moderator leaving PC(USA)

April 1, 2009 by
Filed under: Can't Make This Up, Religion 

SAN FRANCISCO,  April 1 (AFN) – The Rev. Bruce Reyes-Chow, Moderator of the 218th General Assembly of the Presbyterian Church (USA), revealed today that he feels called to leave the denomination that has been his home for all of his 39 years.  Reyes-Chow stated that during his recent Moderatorial trip to Hong Kong and Taiwan, he felt the pull of his Buddhist ancestors and plans to leave the Presbyterian Church and take up the robes of a Buddhist monk.

Robin Pugh, his wife, and his three children are said to be staying with relatives recovering from the announcement.  Our reporter was able to hear a single question from his eldest daughter to her mother:  “Does that mean that I have to shave my head?”

The Rev. Byron Wade, Vice-Moderator of the General Assembly, spoke extensively on the subject of Reyes-Chow’s abandonment of his Presbyterian heritage.  “I’m not at all surprised”, said Wade, “Bruce has always been a bit unusual.  I’m just glad that I get the chance to step into his shoes.  The Moderator gets all of the glamour while the Vice-Moderator is relegated to being a traveling second banana.  Bruce got to go to the Phillipines and China; I had to settle for East Tennessee!”
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There is no word on what will happen at Bruce’s church, Mission Bay Community Church in San Francisco.  Abby Kaiser was last seen rubbing her hands together and cackling with glee.

Check the date, folks.  It’s April Fools!


7 Comments on BREAKING NEWS: PC(USA) Moderator leaving PC(USA)

  1. bobbie on Wed, 1st Apr 2009 8:44 pm
  2. Wait wait it’s not in the Layman yet…
    happy april

  3. Jodie on Fri, 3rd Apr 2009 7:47 pm
  4. But it would be funny if the Layman did publish it

  5. Lina Hart on Sat, 13th Jun 2009 6:14 pm
  6. … and what’s wrong with East Tennessee??!!! Sorry to have missed your visit – evidently you just didn’t link up with the right folks to show you around… L:)

  7. Mamie Broadhurst on Wed, 1st Apr 2015 9:43 am
  8. Hey, Byron got to go to Colombia. No room to complain there… 😉

  9. Ted Churn on Wed, 1st Apr 2015 10:05 am
  10. Taken, hook line and sinker!

  11. Paul Andresen on Wed, 1st Apr 2015 10:57 am
  12. Curious at the Facebook link, curiouser reading the first paragraph, smiling about the middle of the second. Got me hooked.

  13. Pat Brown on Thu, 2nd Apr 2015 11:03 pm
  14. just stop it. Not funny. I bet your mom is not laughing either

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