10 Comments on Annual Congregational Meeting

gannetgirl on Mon, 18th Jun 2007 1:37 pm


Well, here’s how I would look at it — which is of course only one persepctive.

First, it’s only natural that you’d feel envy when it seems that others have been recognized and called “ahead” of you.

Second, it night just be that the Nominating Committee sees that you are well (over?) extended right now and wants to give you space to complete the work you’ve taken on before asking you to add a whole new realm of responsibility.

Third, and I am trying to tread cautiously and gently here: Look at the questions you’ve articulated. “What do I want from the church? What am I looking for? Am I being fed?”

Back to that focus on prayer that I mentioned before. You might want to spend some time asking a different set of questions and listening for the answers. Questions like: What does God want from me? What is God looking for? Is God being fed?

It might take a really long time to hear or see the answer to those questions. They represent a different way of approaching your life of faith than “Haven’t I worked hard enough?” And they require a different kind of attentiveness than planning events (a completely valuable endeavor; don’t get me wrong!).

But I’m thinking, with the questions you’ve been asking, that that kind of attentiveness might be what you want to learn and practice now.

Mark on Mon, 18th Jun 2007 4:01 pm


Gannet:

I hear you.

I think it comes down to the way that we experience God.

I’ve never heard God answer a prayer directly. No burning bushes, no voice in my head, no big glowing neon sign with an answer.

In my experience, God’s presence has been a more gentle tug. I find myself choosing an answer to a decision with the conviction that it’s the right choice but without a lot of logical backup. It’s not emotional – in fact it’s a bit serene.

That “pull” has brought me to my wife, through a few job changes, and to this church.

Because of that, “What do I want” questions are perfectly appropriate versions of “what does God want”. I don’t know how to explain it any better, but when I wrote that about “I” I really meant “God”.

I do have issues with prayer. I don’t see a real cause and effect relationship – something important to a scientific mind like mine. I also know that many people pray for inappropriate things. I do believe that prayer CAN work, and that SOME people receive a response – even a powerful and impossible to ignore response. It doesn’t seem to have happened for me as of yet in that way.

And since I’m not good enough at prayer, I’m also unworthy. *sigh*

gannetgirl on Mon, 18th Jun 2007 5:17 pm


I don’t think of prayer as something that “works” in the sense of cause and effect or getting a burning bush kind of answer. I think of prayer as about developing a relationship, about watching and listening.

I think I know what you mean, and also that you are far from “unworthy!” But as the wonderful little book on prayer by Anthony Bloom says, we are all always beginners.

As hardcore scientific as you are, you might like reading Anthony De Mello or Pierre Teilhard de Chardin.

Quotidian Grace on Tue, 19th Jun 2007 9:16 am


Gannet Girl has wise words, as always, Mark.

Let me just add that having served on several nominating committees in my time in the church I have often heard other members hesitate to nominate someone they thought were already fully committed in other ways and they were concerned about “burnout”. I don’t really agree with this approach because I think the better way is to nominate the best people and then let them decide whether or not to accept and make their own decisions about their other commitments. But it could have happened in your case.

On the other hand, there’s a lot of truth in the old country song “sometimes God’s best gifts are unanswered prayers.”

Mark on Tue, 19th Jun 2007 9:25 am


Perhaps I need to clear up an assumption.

I’m not upset with the nominating committee. I’m at best a bit confused because one standard that I was led to expect (it’s too soon for new people to be made officers – from an Interim Pastoral Assistant) was not followed. At one point they (the Nominating Committee) asked for nominations for officer positions and specifically allowed for self-nomination. They did their job, and I have no criticism of their choices.

What bothers me most is my personal reaction. At my age (let’s just say that I’ve passed the crest of the hill and I’m looking downhill), “why did they choose THEM and not ME?” is a very unbecoming question. I should be over that by now – and at my job I make a lot of statements to others who ask those questions telling them that they can’t compare themselves to others. In the church it’s even more complicated – you are (supposedly) chosen by your peers to do the job that God is calling you to do. Apparently, I got the wrong message.

I’m not really sure what God is calling me to do. I’m asking, but not getting any answers.

gannetgirl on Tue, 19th Jun 2007 9:56 am


Well, I would not presume to offer either wisdom (although that was an awfully nice thing QG said)or the voice of God LOL.

But you have seemed passionate about the youth ministry, the green ministry (still to launch), new membership growth and evangelism, and the church camp experience.

Could it possibly be that God is practically yelling at you? That God is calling you through your passions? Maybe God is looking for a seasoned laborer and is making room for you to develop into such a person.

Oh, and the part about unbecoming questions? I’m sorry but – LOLOLOL. We’re only human.

Mark on Tue, 19th Jun 2007 1:12 pm


A minor correction to Gannet Girl:

The green ministry is launched and seems to be dormant at the moment having accomplished its tasks thus far (recommendations to Buildings and Grounds and the forum). It’s the Welcome and Outreach Task Force that is still unlaunched.

Ilovebeagles on Wed, 20th Jun 2007 3:35 pm


Hi Mark,
You are not alone in your feelings. I’ve gone through the same thing and have questioned my own motivations just as you have written. I’ve been at my church for a number of years now and have always volunteered in youth Sunday School, youth group activities, and even served for several years on the Adult Ministries committee. I was finally asked to be a deacon, but have never been asked to be an elder. I know that they have difficulty finding enough people to serve on session so it kind of gripes me, although I know that is not an appropriate reaction! I got a phone message a couple of weeks ago from someone on the nominating committee to serve in a “leadership position.” When I returned to call I was asked to serve on the deacon board again. It seems that I am not worthy to serve as an elder, but as you said the fact that I am upset about this shows that I am not worthy.

This is particulary difficult for me because as I was growing up my parents were always on the boards at church (a Baptist church). My dad was frequently chairman of the Deacon Board and finally ended up serving several terms as moderator of the church. I always thought I’d follow in the same path.

I wonder how many others out there have these same feelings?

Mark on Wed, 20th Jun 2007 3:57 pm


Beagle –

THANK YOU!!!! I can’t begin to tell you how wonderful it is to know that I’m not alone.

Although not the case at Lawrenceville (I think), there are many churches where session membership is kept to an inner circle. The church that I grew up in was like that, and the circle was made up exclusively of those who were ardent supporters of the pastor.

My parents were both Presbyterian Deacons. If I remember correctly, Mom was ordained a few years before me and Dad was ordained a year after me. I clearly remember laying hands on one of them when they were ordained (back when deacons were allowed to lay hands on deacons – they aren’t anymore). There might have been a small period of time where all three of us were serving (that church had 33 deacons at the time so it’s not like we were a power block). I might have that backwards – maybe Dad was first. Neither of them has ever been chosen as an elder, but then in that church they never strongly supported either senior pastor (and both acted to control through power politics). My parents ultimately left that church partially in disgust and partially because it was time to retire to another part of the state – and I was unceremoniously transferred to the inactive roll shortly afterwards.

Jon on Thu, 21st Jun 2007 3:41 pm


Mark, I am posting a little late on this, but it may be connected with your “introvert” post. I have sometimes also been resentful when peers advance rapidly, and I have noticed that often the extroverts are more likely to be recognized and chosen. I do not know whether you were nominated, or whether you spoke to the folks on session, but if you are interested in the future be sure to let them know.

Another challenge in churches is that leaders are very cautious about taking someone who is working in thankless jobs (youth ministry, membership) and moving them elsewhere. You may be a victim of your own hard work! For what it’s worth, I believe youth ministry is much more “important” than just about anything else in the church.

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