Reception of New Members
Today the Lawrenceville Presbyterian Church received me (and 15 others) as new members of the church.
All of us were asked to sit up front in the church along with our families. Carolyn joined me this weekend (taking a break from the Catholic thing) and sat with me in the first pew. I think I like it better towards the back. The building looked full – just enough room for everybody to be comfortable rather than crammed in.
The bulletin included a legal size page with our pictures and self-written bios on both sides.
Just after the Children’s Message, we were called up by name to be recognized as new members. One of us, Kate – a student at Princeton Seminary – needed to be baptized. We were all asked the traditional baptism questions as our formal profession of faith, and then Kate was baptized in what has to be the wettest baptism I’ve ever seen in a Presbyterian church (water was actually running down her back). Then the congregation read the Words of Welcome from the Book of Common Worship, and sang a hymn “Blest Be the Tie That Binds” and the congregation was then invited to pass the peace (moved from the beginning of the service). The Peace was as chaotic as usual with the crowd of us tripping over each other. Then we all sat down and the service continued.
This is necessary if you want to avoid experiencing undesired effects when taking the purchase viagra from india medication. It is when a person fears being alone, and is terrified at the possibility of not viagra cipla being able to get erection. You need to Order blue pills online in lowest price to viagra india prices take pleasure of love making life and that too a hour prior to the demonstration. Impotence happens free prescription for levitra to a person only when he is sexually stimulated. One pleasant surprise was the hymn just before we were received. It was “I Danced in the Morning” (#302 in the blue Presbyterian hymnal, if you’re playing along at home). The Rev. Tim Ives was the Associate Pastor at the church that I grew up in. He has to be in the top 5 people responsible for my spiritual growth, and I doubt that I would have been a deacon, YAD, member of Synod committees, or Youth Triennium participant if it weren’t for him. This hymn was the centerpiece of his service of installation in that church. “I am the Lord of the Dance, said He” Freaky coincidence? Carolyn and I don’t think so.
At the end of the service, the group of new members left at the beginning of the last hymn to form a receiving line in Fellowship Hall. I managed to get Carolyn to stand next to me – after all she is part of the family now, too. We then met a huge crowd of people, most of whom who told me their name and few that I remember, and then we had the cake that was specially made for us. We chatted with all sorts of folks and then headed home.
This is the end of the journey that began in August 2005 when another volunteer at Camp Johnsonburg asked me “What church do you belong to?” and I had no answer. It went on to include the Reconnecting with Faith – Finding Your Home retreat at camp and my church search.
While this is the end of the journey back home, it is certainly NOT the end of my spiritual journey. I hope to bring you news as time goes on. I look forward to this church finding a way to pull me into greater involvement – I’m eager to get started but I need help to find that first thing to volunteer for. And I also look forward to telling the story of this successful journey at the new Reconnecting with Faith retreat next January.
I am a Presbyterian, again
Last night, the session of the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville, NJ voted to receive me as a member by Reaffirmation of Faith. This ends my nearly 20 year departure from the church (and at least a few years off the rolls anywhere).
I wasn’t alone – there were 15 others joining at this time. Three by Profession of Faith, Six by Reaffirmation of Faith and 7 by Letter of Transfer. As I’ve said before, this was a very diverse group on everything but age. The new members live as far away from Lawrenceville as Lahaska, PA and Bensalem, PA. There are two first-year students at Princeton Seminary. The ages run from early 20’s to “I don’t want to even guess” retired. When you add the non-member spouses (like mine) and young children, the group ends up being more like 25 people.
In fact, we outnumbered the elder members of the session. Because the group was so large, the session had to start their meeting in the chapel and move to their usual spot after the new member portion was complete.
We got started about 7pm with new members and session members filtering into the room. The chairs were arranged in a big circle that just barely fit in the room, and the new members and session members were interspersed throughout the circle.
The idea behind this is that this way the blood stays sale on viagra on for long time in the penis, which results to the improvement in erection. Apart from tablets, a patient can use http://www.devensec.com/sustain/eidis-updates/IndustrialSymbiosisupdateAug_Nov2011.pdf cheapest viagra generic the simplest form of genuine drug if getting issues to swallow a pill. It is possible to generic tadalafil tablets produce positive results in their erections. This course we offer is one of the best cheap viagra in india herbal remedies to prevent and treat ED completely. The main portion of the meeting was taken up by the introductions. Each new member was asked to give some information on themselves, their families, their faith journey and why they chose Lawrenceville. Each session member did the same, substituting what membership means for them for their faith journey. Due to the size of the group, this took over 45 minutes.
After that, the session voted to receive us into membership and to authorize the baptism of one of us. We then said a common prayer and passed the peace. The session then left the room to continue their meeting (being 1/2 hour behind schedule due to our group’s size) and the rest of us headed home.
On Sunday, we will be recognized during the service and one of us will be baptized. We’ve been instructed to sit up front in the reserved pews (along with family) and that we will be called to stand in front of the congregation at some point. During the final hymn we will be escorted out to form a receiving line in Fellowship Hall.
The one funny point of the evening came when one of the new members talked about the music program and choir being part of his reason for choosing Lawrenceville. An elder who is in choir (and who was still jet-lagged from the mission trip to Israel) leaned over and told him when the choir meets. He then informed her that he’s been in the choir for six months! Apparently short women in the soprano section up front can’t see the big guys in the baritone section in back.
Why Lawrenceville?
Tonight, I go before the session of the Lawrenceville Presbyterian Church (NJ) to be received by Reaffirmation of Faith as a new member. There are about 15-20 of us (I think) being received by various methods. To that number you can add 6-10 kids.
A while back, I wrote about my return to the church after an absence of almost 20 years. What I didn’t really put into that post was why I chose this particular church. Apparently, I’m going to be asked that question tonight, so here’s my summary of why (in no particular order).
1. It feels like the church that I grew up in.
That could have been a bad thing (since I had some issues with my original church that were minor contributors to my departure), but I checked on the issues that I had with the church that I grew up in and reportedly they are not a problem here. The way in which Lawrenceville feels like the church that I grew up in are: size (number of members and attendees, size of sanctuary/buildings), service format and content (basically a traditional service with the old standard hymns and a format that I’m used to), music program (wow! can this congregation sing!) and an active youth group.
2. The church has a policy of tolerance for all viewpoints.
A church can either be somewhere along the “conservative” to “liberal” axis, choose to work for tolerance of all viewpoints (within reason), or choose to avoid controversial issues. Based on what I was told (and have seen since), this church shows an unusual tolerance for a wide range of opinion. One story that I was told was about a table at a men’s meeting where a discussion of a controversial issue erupted. Two people staked out the opposite positions, but everybody contributed with opinions all the way across the spectrum on that issue. None of it was heated. That’s what I want – nice respectful academic discussion. Having said that, the church averages out to someplace center to progressive in theology. This is truly a “big tent” within the Presbyterian mold.
3. This church is a thinking church.
There is a big emphasis on adult education and study. Not just “let’s all study the Bible together” but discussions on applying faith to issues.
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4. The church has lots of volunteer opportunities.
There are a lot of things going on. The church wants to have as many people involved as possible – but at the same time doesn’t want to push anybody beyond what they want to do.
5. Church leadership is open and involves lots of people
Unlike other churches that I know (or grew up in), this church rotates a lot of people through it’s leadership roles. At the ordination/installation service that I attended they asked anybody who had ever been an elder or minister to get up and lay hands on the new officers. 1/3 of the congregation got up – a HUGE ratio.
That list was written back in August when I chose this church. Since then, I have also come to realize that there is a warmth to this congregation that might not be apparent to a casual visitor (or a summer visitor, for that matter). Put simply – people care at this church. About each other, about people in the local community, about justice, about evangelism. There is a level of warm commitment – not just words or slogans but actual one-to-one action.
Feels good to me.
Tomorrow, you should be reading a post about tonight’s meeting.
Getting Involved at church
This week I have a homework assignment from New Member Class. I have to check off a list of activities that the church does that interest me. I also need to answer two questions: What do I expect to get out of Lawrenceville Presbyterian, and what do I expect to give to Lawrenceville Presbyterian?
I’m a rather strong introvert. It’s not always easy to detect – I tend to speak of myself as a “loud introvert”, someone who can keep up a facade that makes me appear more outgoing. As you may or may not know, introverts draw their energy from a different type of activity than extroverts (aside from eating and sleeping, of course). Extroverts go into social situations and actually draw energy from the room. Introverts on the other hand need solitude or a small group of close friends to create energy. Introverts can actually feel the energy draining from them in a large social setting like a party. Extroverts may go home charged up – introverts tend to go home exhausted. This is a big generalization, but still true.
So how does this relate to new church members (and me in particular)? I speak from my own experience.
I have to work hard to feel comfortable in a setting like the usual Fellowship Hour after church. I’m fairly comfortable in church – I’m there as part of a mostly anonymous crowd and only interact personally with those sitting around me, and even then only for the passing of the peace. But put me in a room and I’m lost. I end up a single individual wandering around the room without talking to someone, or even standing on the side. I will talk to those that I know, but I’m fairly unlikely to walk up to someone and introduce myself.
On the other hand, in a known group and particularly a small group, I’m fairly comfortable. On a committee, in a small study group, as part of a team – I’m comfortable. I know my place. It’s even more comfortable when I’m part of a group working towards a goal – putting together a special service, running a youth activity, serving on a committee, or even just bean-counting. In fact, that’s the best way for me to meet people – to work with them towards a common goal.
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So the hard part is getting that bootstrap job in an organization. I feel like I need to be invited to participate in that first activity, and if it’s not joining an organized group but is more like an open activity I need to be dragged along. Once I’ve done something with people, I will know them and be more open to fully voluntary participation in the next thing. It’s just getting into that first thing that’s so hard.
The one exception to this rule is Camp Johnsonburg. This camp is the one place on the planet (no hyperbole here) where I have felt totally accepted for being authentically ME outside of my marriage. Camp Johnsonburg works hard to create that acceptance and even celebration of each of us – it’s probably the 2nd or 3rd core value of the camp. I go there, smell the unique combination of plants in the air, and feel at home immediately. The tension in my body drops dramatically nearly instantly. I am ME, and people like me for being me. There’s nothing more powerful than hearing “We’re glad that you came” and knowing that they really meant it. That they didn’t mean “We’re glad that you brought your money” or “We’re glad that you brought your skills” or even “We’re glad that you added one to the headcount”. We’re glad that you came – that you are who you are and that you are sharing it with us. That’s powerful. That’s a core of my theology – that all people are good to God to some degree or in some way unique to them.
As I re-read what I wrote above, I realize that camp isn’t really the only such time. There have been a few more. Serving as a YAD to Synod was like that. More recently, meeting with Jill, Nolan and Rick about Lawrenceville Presbyterian was like that – I felt at ease in the first few minutes. It might not have been on my checklist, but it was a huge factor in choosing a church.
So what does this mean when joining a church? I need to be pulled in. Please pull me in. You won’t be disappointed. I know that I have skills that can be put to good use, and I’ll give you a list on that piece of paper you asked me to fill out. I just need a little tug to get out of my shell.
New Member Class – Day 3 (Last Day)
Today was the last day of new member class.
Carolyn and I just barely made it on time due to Carolyn’s mammogram (routine – as far as we know all is well). She made it home, and after some bending of the speed limit laws we made it to class just on time. We had expected Carolyn to join us late, so this was better than we thought.
This week, we had a few new faces. One friend of a participant visiting from out of town, and a new person (another seminary student) who is being run through “remedial New Member Class” to catch up. Most if not all of the missing folks from last week were there today.
We started with another sharing session – this time talking about why we believe that Lawrenceville Presbyterian is right for us. This is one of the questions that the session will ask us in a week and a half, so I believe that this was planned to let us gather our thoughts. This took about 1/2 hour (and we got started 10 minutes late – everybody was running late today).
Next, we did a Lectio Divina session on Genesis 2:4-9. We did a breathing exercise to calm us, and then the passage was read twice by two different people. We meditated on it for a few minutes, and then each of us gave our thoughts. I concentrated on the trees. I had two thoughts – one was that I liked the diversity of the trees, all different and yet all good for food. I believe that God sees people like that – all good (to some degree) and good for each other (to some degree). The passage also brought to mind the fact that I’m now old enough that I can see the growth of trees. I’m thinking primarily of the trees around our house – which over the 10 years that we’ve been here have grown from saplings to substantial trees.
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At the end, Jill asked me to speak about the Reconnecting with Faith retreat coming up in January. I spoke extemporaneously for a few minutes on the retreat and I hope that a few people found it intriguing. This group isn’t really the target audience – they are already in a church – but perhaps they know of someone else.
After the formal class, a few deacons arrived and laid out a brunch for any of us who could stay. They had bagels, fruit salad, and two casseroles (the ham and egg one was good!) and drinks and such. We all sat around and talked and ate. It was nice.
I have a homework assignment – I have to fill out a worksheet for Jill identifying the areas of church life that I would be interested in participating in and there are a few questions on the back about what we expect to get from the church and what we plan to give to the church (not just money, time and resources).
We meet with the session on November 15th. They take us into membership formally at that time, and then we are introduced at church the following Sunday.
New Member Class – Day 2
Today, we all struggled out of bed into the driving rain and heavy winds to reach Lawrenceville Presbyterian and the 2nd day of new member class. At one point on Route 206 the road was partially flooded due to leaves blocking the storm drain.
This time, we started with each person telling a story of their experience with church. Most (if not all) were positive stories of their experiences in church during a previous life. A few were non-church stories involving church camp or even a special Christian performance. A surprising number of people indicated a fondness for the formal ritual of church, but this isn’t surprising as many of the group had experience in a Roman Catholic or Byzantine Rite church (Greek Orthodox, Russian Orthodox, etc) church.
After that we took a tour of the church buildings. Normally this would end the second session, but Temple Micah (a Jewish temple sharing the church building on Fridays and Saturdays) had a Bat Mitzvah (congratulations, Rachel!) scheduled for the morning so we had to get our tour in early. We heard about the history of the church and saw most of the church rooms.
The india generic cialis victims those who unfortunately got trapped by this sexual malfunction. There are some tadalafil overnight delivery http://greyandgrey.com/appellate-victories/triola/ people who take these issues very rapidly. It is difficult to complete the sexual activity successfully, feel bad about it. viagra vs generic The main objective and interest of physiotherapy is to maximise movement as well as levitra sale quality of life by people suffering from lupus. After that, we were almost out of time. Pastor Jeff pointed out some important points in the handouts on Presbyterian terms and the importance of membership and talked about the Book of Confessions and the Book of Order. We were then exhorted to read up at home.
Next week will be on stewardship and we will do Lectio Divina. Pastor Jeff will be in Israel and Palestine with a presbytery group, and won’t be able to attend. Joan Semenuk will be joining us.
There were a few faces missing this week. I’m hoping that they were unable to make the class rather than deciding not to join. We were also blessed with whole families this week because the terrible weather cancelled soccer games.
Reconnecting with Faith: Finding Your Home Retreat – January 26-28, 2007
Re-Connecting with Faith: Finding Your Home – Adult Retreat
Johnsonburg Presbyterian Center, Johnsonburg, NJ
January 26-28, 2007
Are you considering a church home? Do you currently attend a church, but feel like you’re not getting everything you need? Are you looking at spiritual alternatives? Have you recently moved and need to find a new church? If you answered yes to any of these questions, this retreat is for you!
For a variety of reasons, a large number of adults leave the spiritual home of their youth, or spirituality altogether. However, after a while, many of these people feel like something is missing in their lives. Returning to a spiritual community after an absence can be a bit challenging for many people. Will you encounter the situations that caused you to leave? Will you be accepted? Will you be fulfilled? All too often these challenges result in the person staying away from a spiritual community altogether, and everyone loses.
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Or perhaps you’ve moved to a new area and are having trouble finding that church home like the one you left behind. This can often be a long and difficult process. After all, how do you go about “trying on” churches, or even denominations for that matter?
This weekend long retreat is held for adults who are currently without a spiritual home, or who are attending a church but don’t feel fed there. We’ll take some time to tell our own stories; who we are and what it is we’re seeking. We’ll also look at some of the challenges in finding a spiritual home and what some different churches have to offer. Come and join those who have gone through this discernment process before and who can help you find your way.
For more information, contact the camp office at 908-852-2349 or info@campjburg.org. The camp website is found at http://www.campjburg.org/. The cost will be $45 per person, but if money is what’s keeping you from the retreat contact the camp – we have limited assistance available.
New Member Class – Day 1
Yesterday was also the first day of New Member Classes at the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville, NJ. Classes are 9am to 10:30am and will continue on October 28 and November 4. These classes are run about 3 times a year.
The classes are actually intended to explore membership and prepare you should you choose to join. It looks like most of the group is headed towards joining.
There are about 20 people in this group. Yesterday, 14 of them were there (several spouses were off handling soccer duty). This was a very diverse group in terms of age and some other factors, though not racially.
The format was remarkably similar to the Johnsonburg Reconnecting with Faith retreat. We all sat in a bit circle (well, oval – it was a big group) with the pastor and the Interim Associate for Pastoral Ministry (in this case Jill Cifelli) mixed in the group. Each of us were asked to introduce ourselves and talk about what we do during the day. Jill started, and because her daytime work is church-related we ended up with each person describing briefly their church search as well as their day job. Carolyn came with me and explained that she is a practicing Catholic (seems she’d get good at it at some point!) and was there to support me.
After that, we watched the video Who Are We Presbyterians?. This is a 20-minute video that does a good job of presenting the high points of Presbyterian faith and organization, though it does tend to concentrate a little too hard on diversity.
Then we were asked to talk about what we saw in the video. A few people who are new to Presbyterianism stated that they really liked Salvation by Grace as compared to their prior church. A few group members brought up the liberal/conservative divide (it wasn’t me, honest!) and we batted that around for a while. The jist of that discussion is that this church favors the open discussion of issues while staunchly defending freedom of conscience. The phrase used was “generous orthodoxy”. In short – we have people all over the spectrum and we LIKE that, and encourage people to speak their mind. Rigid control of belief within narrow confines is not required. Having said that, the church averages out to someplace between the middle and liberal end of the spectrum. Not quite far enough to be a More Light church, but certainly not at the conservative end.
The one thing that people said over and over is that this church cares more for each person as a PERSON than they do about their particular ideology. People are not representatives of a theological or political position – they are PEOPLE who happen to have a personal theology and political opinion. At least 1/2 of the group said that this was an important factor in their choice of Lawrenceville as a church home (and I’m in that list).
One last similarity to the Johnsonburg retreat appeared. Carolyn put it best on the way home – “There are some hurt and angry people here.” This makes complete sense to me. You come to a church as a new adult member for one or more of a short list of reasons:
- You left the church at some point because you were not spiritually at home, unhappy or even hurt by the church.
- You drifted away from the church because of disinterest.
- You have children, and need to find a church home for baptism, sunday school, etc. Or maybe you want to get married in a church.
- You’ve recently moved and need to find a new church.
- You’ve never been involved in a church, but you’ve found the redeeming power of Christ.
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Based on the stories that were told, the latter reason may have been a part of one or two people’s reasons out of 14. The rest of the reasons covered everybody.
I was amazed at the distances that people travel to join this church. One new member is driving from upper Bucks County, PA. A few others are coming from Princeton. I’m coming from Hamilton. We had one couple where one of the two people cited “it’s the closest church” as the reason for joining. These folks either came back to the church that they grew up in or had a deliberate search path (not as regimented as mine, but just as comprehensive). (Side note – just by listening I’ve learned a lot to incorporate in the next retreat.)
At the end of the session, we had a moment to fill out some paperwork. We have to write a brief biography that will be published in the church bulletin and newsletter after we join – I’m still working on that. We also had our pictures taken to be put in the bulletin and newsletter.
Next week we have a session on stewardship. At some point, we’re going to participate in a session of Lectio Divina but I’m not sure which week. In mid-November on a Wednesday we meet with the session, and then are introduced (and in some cases baptized?) on November 19.
I’ll write up the remaining classes as well. Keep watching this blog!
Reconnecting with Faith – Finding Your Home
I’ve written previously about my journey back to the church. One important part of that was the Reconnecting with Faith – Finding Your Home retreat held at Camp Johnsonburg last January. Today I’ll write about that retreat and ask your help.
The retreat ran Friday evening (about 8pm) until Sunday morning before lunch (about 11am). The retreaters were housed at the camp’s lodges, which thankfully are heated in the winter (and fairly comfy). Meals were held at the dining hall, though we had tons of munchies in the lodges. Most of the retreat participants were couples, and the camp managed to provide each couple with a private room (2 people in a room that sleeps 3-4).
The retreat followed all of the Johnsonburg standard values – challenge by choice, no discounting others, be yourself.
The program elements were (in rough order, from my memory):
- Introduction Games
- Informal Chat and Food until bedtime Friday
- After breakfast, Tell Your Story (only if you want to)
- Presbyterian 101 (an hour explaining Presbyterian faith and the history of the church)
- Lunch
- Small Group Breakout and results – What You Want in a Church
- Suggestions for How to Find a Congregation
- Free Time (camp trails, etc. available)
- Dinner
- Candlelight Labyrinth in the gym
- Where Are We session (to talk about where we are, suggest where to go from here)
- Voluntary worship planning (by participants, with staff assistance if needed) and hangout until bedtime
- After breakfast, free time or outdoor labyrinth
- Worship
- Closing, evaluations, and long goodbyes with lots of hugs
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By far, the most emotional and valuable time was the Tell Your Story time. Each person (including the staff and some staff spouses) spent some time telling their faith journey story – highs and lows. Some stories were pretty straightforward – others were tear-filled stories of pain. All showed unexpected depth in each person (including my wife – I learned things I hadn’t learned in the almost 20 years we’ve known each other).
Of the original group (and not counting the staff), only one person was attending church regularly before this retreat. At this point 9 months later, about 40% of the group are attending church regularly (that I know of – it could be higher). Others are seeking a different outlet for their spiritual lives; some are looking at home churches and others are exploring the breadth of spiritual expression beyond Christianity.
So why do I need your help?
This original group was selected from former camp summer staff. This was both accidental and intentional – the original impetus for the group came from an online community of former camp summer staff, and the camp intentionally wanted to try the program out with people that they knew would be able to evaluate the program at the same time as attending it. Those former camp summer staff were all formerly-churched people who were Presbyterian (surprise, it’s a Presbyterian camp!) who mostly brought along their spouses. None of the spouses came from a Presbyterian background.
We are getting ready to plan for the next group to go through the program. I’m on staff for this one, and it will be held in January 2007. We are seriously considering having the original group come back for a followup retreat at the same time, and having a few activities be joint activities. I believe that the plan for this one is to open it up beyond the former staff community to include anyone. The target audience is any adult (though I don’t think we’d turn away an older high school student or college student) who may be considering joining a church, used to belong to a church, or has questions about whether Christianity or specifically the Presbyterian Church (USA) is right for them. We encourage people to bring their spouses or significant others.
What you can help me with is this: What do you think the unchurched or formerly churched are looking for from a program like this? Are there topics that you don’t see covered in the list above? Is there something in that list that you would eliminate? How do we reach the unchurched or formerly churched – how do we find people who want to look at joining a church?
The first planning meeting will be this coming Saturday so any comments received by then would be helpful. However, ideas are always welcome and can be incorporated all the way up to the day the retreat begins.
Please leave your comments or suggestions in Comments here, or send them via e-mail to me (see the link at left). If for some reason comments aren’t working for you, please let me know that too – I’ve been having trouble.
Thank you.
Exploring Membership classes
I got a letter from the church last night about Exploring Membership classes.
It was a form letter (minus 1/2 point) apparently sent to folks who are new and attending but not members yet. It invites us to come to these 3 meetings (1.5 hours each on Saturday morning at 9am) to learn about the church’s beliefs, the meaning of membership and what’s going on at the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville. (Or something like that – I’m writing from memory.)
There was one nice touch in the letter. My wife is Catholic and planning to stay that way. She has been a little nervous about my “new church” experience as it impacts her. She’s worried that we scary Presbyterians will try to convert her, or look down on her because of her Catholicism. She was worried about the camp retreat last January – and pleasantly surprised to find them completely accepting of her choice. In this case, the pastor wrote a note on the bottom of the form letter asking me to convey his invitation to her to attend the Exploring Membership classes with me if she wanted to. (Plus 1 whole point)
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I’m pretty sure I’m already signed up, so I just have to let them know if Carolyn will attend.
I will be writing about these classes after they happen – check back in late October.
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