Stewardship and Humor
From the minutes of the Presbytery of New Brunswick Mission Council, September 25, 2007:
Based upon the average household income of
$93,277 per year and the likely contribution behavior in the area, the overall
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You can’t ask for a better typo (emphasis mine).
Run Ragged
I’m at my ragged end. I’ve been doing too much.
First, there’s work Monday to Friday 8-5. That’s a given.
Last Thursday – spend the evening doing laundry to get ready for Carolyn’s trip to Germany
Last Friday – spend a quiet evening with Carolyn
Saturday – get up, go to church Officer’s Retreat and give report on Welcome and Outreach Task Force. Get home, discover that Internet router will not route. Go to Circuit City, buy replacement. Install. Have 1 hour with Carolyn before she goes to the airport.
Sunday – church in the morning. Then stay for Confirmation initial meeting lunch until 1pm. Go home, pay bills. Clean home office to get ready for FIOS installation. Get ready for evening. Go to church for youth group. Get home at 9:30. Get ready for bed.
Monday – after work, platelet donation – almost rejected for high BP due to exhaustion. That takes 2 hours. Go home, reboot DirecTV receiver. Prepare and eat dinner and get a chance to watch 20 minutes of TV. Get ready for bed and go to bed late.
Tuesday (today) – after work, go home. Make and eat dinner. Go to church for Youth and Young Adult Council. Get home about 9. Get ready for bed and try to go to bed a little early.
Is it possible that the party changed their email address? Simply because you’ve hit “reply” doesn’t mean that the sender’s own email address entered in the slovak-republic.org buy cheap cialis “reply to” field has been spelled correctly. The removal might be partial or total. viagra super Few things to take care when you are using Kamagra jelly: You should take this medicine http://www.slovak-republic.org/symbols/honours/ viagra uk sales only once in two months or so, then that can easily be called as the ‘next step’ in the ever-developing technological civilization, that we all are a part of. So modern science did carry out huge research and medical research, medical experts have succeeded in inventing effective oral medicines that work by improving the effects of nitric oxide, a super levitra chemical that actually relaxes smooth muscles in the penis during sexual stimulation and allows increased blood flow. Wednesday – take day off from work for FIOS installation (expected to take 5-6 hours). Cut lawn if not raining. Possible quiet evening. Do laundry so that there isn’t much to do when Carolyn gets home. In the evening, conference call with pastor and co-chair for Welcome and Outreach Task Force.
Thursday – After work, eat leisurely dinner in only 1/2 hour. Head to Princeton for Theology on Tap young adult evening. Get home late, go to bed late.
Friday – Carolyn gets home from Germany in the afternoon. Do her laundry. Start packing for Saturday.
Saturday – Carolyn and I go to NYC for our 13th wedding anniversary and the 20th anniversary of our first date (both on Monday). Don’t have any specific plans for Saturday yet.
Sunday – go to church in the morning (St. Patrick’s Cathedral?). Go to Spamalot in the afternoon. No evening plans yet.
Monday – maybe a morning NYC activity, then drive home. Collapse.
Tuesday – Friday – vacation from work. No specific plans. SLEEP.
The only activities scheduled by me were the FIOS installation, platelet donation, and the NYC trip (planned over 6 months ago). The rest were scheduled by others.
Why We Do It
If you ever wonder why youth leaders volunteer several hours per week (at least) to work with a bunch of teenagers, last night’s senior high youth group session provides the answer.
The youth director was very busy this week (Confirmation started yesterday) and didn’t really have time to plan out last night’s meeting. God stepped in.
We had music on at the beginning, and the youth who were there were grooving to it. The youth director tossed a few rhythm instruments around the room and we all jammed to the Beatles for a few minutes. Later he taught us a few songs of faith from foreign lands, and the youth loved it.
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For the rest of the meeting, we used M&M’s to talk about what happened in the last week. Red was how you experienced love, Yellow was a joy, Brown was something bad that happened, Blue was when you were sad, Orange was when you saw God, etc. This ultimately brought out some difficult issues that some of the youth were dealing with. What was most heartening to me was that when this happened, other youth jumped in to help the youth in tears before the adult advisors could. Because of our covenants the group provided the safe space required to work through the emotions.
The youth director said that this was by far the best evening he’d had since he started working here over a year ago. It was decidedly the best that I’ve had. THIS is what youth ministry is about.
Shame and the Stewardship Campaign
As I have discussed previously, I turned down the invitation to serve on the Stewardship committee this year. I did this even though they were using the Consecration Sunday curriculum – which I was assured was not about the need for the church to receive but about the need for the person to give. I was also told that it would be about more than money, but also about service.
So far this year we’ve had two “Minute for Mission” presentations at the beginning of the service. In one, a woman who has recently experienced several deaths of close family members spoke of the care that she has received from the church. She also explained how this year’s campaign is different than last year’s in that a budget is not being prepared before the campaign – we don’t know How Much We Need. I have no issues with this presentation.
The second one is the one that bothers me. Another committee member spent 5 minutes at the beginning of the service going over a sheet called “Grow One” from the Consecration Sunday curriculum. She went into detail about how to read the sheet and apply it to each of our situations.
One side of the sheet was the traditional income vs. percentage table. On the left side was your income (different this year in that it isn’t annual income but weekly income) and across the top are percentages – with groups of percentages labeled things like “Low”, “Middle” and “High”. In the center is the weekly pledge for that income and percentage. Now while I find it hard to believe that our well-educated congregation needs help dividing their income by 10 to find the 10% tithe, or can’t use a calculator, I suppose this could be helpful to someone.
It’s the other side of the sheet that bothers me. On that sheet, a stair-step graphic appeared. Under each step was a range of weekly contribution. The lowest range was 1c to $19.99 per week and the highest (of about 11) was $200 or more. (I have to wonder who is pledging 52c per year.) Above each step is the number of pledges in that group. Our congregation is concentrated in two places – a group at or slightly above midpoint and a larger group about 1/4 of the way up from the bottom. No information on incomes or situations – just how much per week.
Also included in the bulletin was a reservation form for the Consecration Sunday presentation and lunch. After the speech was completed, the ushers collected the forms before the worship service began. This again seems very coercive to me – using peer pressure.
Here’s what bothers me. This is clearly intended to shame people into making a larger pledge. This is NOT using the positive power of the Holy Spirit in order to encourage increased giving – it’s using the earthly power of peer pressure to shame people into making a larger pledge. We should NEVER be comparing ourselves to others – we should be comparing ourselves to the ideal that Jesus provides. We never ask whether or not we should avoid sin because the session thinks we should – we are to avoid sin because God wants us to.
Another troubling aspect of this method is it fails to take into account individual situations. I know that we have people of all ages who have suffered debilitating illnesses that have caused them to stop working. I know that we have families where the primary breadwinner is out of work (due to outsourcing in many cases). What do these people think and feel when they read a chart showing their pledge as being below average? Is it really a good idea to induce shame in those powerless to correct the situation?
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Something else that bothers me is confidentiality. We were told last year that only 3 people know what we pledge – the person who opens the pledge card envelopes, the Treasurer, and the person who issues our envelopes. So why then are we seeing counts of pledges at various levels? It seems that confidentiality is being broken, maybe not at the individual person level but overall.
Please note that I’m fine with hearing that the TOTAL giving is $X00,000 and that our budget last year was $Y00,000 and that we’ll have to cut some programs if we don’t make up the difference. I just don’t like making it personal. My gifts to the church are between me and God. For that matter, my gifts to the church are a whole lot bigger than the check that I put in the envelope weekly. Conservatively, I’ll estimate that outside of worship I volunteer 30 hours a month to the congregation (through youth group, committee work, and the like) and another hour or two per month on average to the church camp. And that doesn’t consider any contribution that I might make through blogging about church here and at other blogs (a highly subjective value, I suspect).
I said earlier that I was bothered by this campaign. That was a bit inaccurate. My real feelings are somewhere between bothered and infuriated. I nearly tore up my weekly check and envelope. I briefly considered the reaction if I got up and walked out.
I will not be at church on Consecration Sunday. The Monday after that Sunday is my 13th wedding anniversary and the 20th anniversary of Carolyn and my first date. We will be in NYC for the weekend celebrating. I’m lucky in that I won’t be there.
Maybe I should just find someplace else to worship during Stewardship season every fall. I’ll just go worship at another church that isn’t doing Stewardship from about the last week of September through the middle of October – whatever week the cards are turned in.
Supposedly, because I’m missing Consecration Sunday I won’t get a pledge card until AFTER that date. I’d be happy to fill it out now and make it all go away. Apparently I have to wait until I’m considered delinquent before they’ll even GIVE me a card. And it’ll come with a personal contact. More coercion.
(Lest you think I’m griping because I’m at the low end of the pool: My weekly contribution was above the midpoint on their stair chart. That is true even though I appear to the church to be a single-person household – Carolyn also gives a similar amount to her church.)
Good Weekend
I’m tired, but happy.
Friday evening I headed out to church to be the 2nd wave driver for the Sr. High retreat. There were a few youth who played football who needed to leave later than the 6pm departure time. I got there at 6:15, and the first wave in the big van didn’t leave until 6:30. Ultimately we all got to camp and settled in about 9pm.
We headed out to the waterfront and held a campfire, complete with singing and S’mores. I’m not usually a big fan of s’mores (I prefer to eat the components separately), but I had one anyway so that the vegetarian youth could roast a marshmallow (they contain gelatin, you know). After that we finally got to bed around midnight.
The next morning was quiet. After breakfast, we headed into the woods and did a trust/togetherness exercise that involved walking along a rope strung between trees with your eyes closed. It was done alone, then with a guide, then alone again. It’s sort of a “walking with Jesus” exercise. After that we had a talk about when God is and is not present in your life and the youth got into some pretty heavy topics. I was very impressed with the way that this group handled people’s difficult times without making fun – that’s pretty rare in this age group.
The rest of the morning was “free” time. A group played football in the meadow while others rested in the lodge. We ended the morning with a game of “Have you ever….” Jenga. This uses the book “Have you Ever …?” along with a Jenga game with the tiles numbered (by hand). Each participant pulls a tile out of the stack, places it on top, and the number on the tile is used to find a numbered question in the book. If tiles are recycled you just add 100, 200, etc. to the tile number. We got the stack up to 29 levels before it fell. (The record is 40 plus two tiles.)
We had lunch, and then headed home.
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Sunday was another church-packed day. The morning service included an introduction of our 3 seminary interns (with CAKE at the Fellowship Hour). After Fellowship time, Temple Micah invited us to join them in the sukkah that they’d built on the front lawn of the manse. There was also the 2nd half of an adult forum series on Presbyterian beliefs that I attended (tough choice, but I’d already done the homework for the forum). (Discussion for another post – what the heck are we doing listing people’s pledges by size for comparison when we’re doing Consecration Sunday that is supposedly NOT about the numbers?)
At the end of the adult forum I got recruited to usher at the afternoon Jazz Vespers service, which brought me back to church after a 2 hour rest. The music was provided by Presbybop, a jazz quartet founded by Presbyterian clergy. The service was attended by about 130 people, and was wonderful. Presbybop has taken some traditional hymns and jazzed them up while retaining the proper feeling and words. We sang two of those, and other music was included. Rev. Bill Carter did the homily. The service was based on the Book of Common Worship’s “Evening Prayer” order of worship – appropriate to the setting sun. The congregation was energized by the service.
After the service, dinner was provided by the choir. Excellent food was catered from Chuckles with dessert from church members and the leftovers from Fellowship Hour in the morning. Carolyn and I sat with the youth group for dinner, and met Rev. Karen Hernandez-Granzen of Westminster Presbyterian Church in Trenton.
After dinner we headed back to the sanctuary for a one-set concert by Presbybop. Folks, these guys know their jazz. You can find them on iTunes, and their CDs are for sale at CDBaby.com. The congregation was brought to their feet at the end for a standing ovation (and we did get an encore). It was hysterical to see the upright and sometimes elderly Presbyterians swaying and nodding their heads to the wonderful jazz. I saw one guy air drumming using the pens from the prayer card racks in the pews.
I’m still short on sleep, but it was a truly wonderful weekend.
Meetings and trip
It’s been another busy week in Mark-land.
Sunday we had the real Sr. High youth group kickoff session. We had fun, got introduced to each other, played around, and ate ice cream. It’s a good group of youth including not one but TWO exchange students.
Monday evening we had the first meeting of the Welcome and Outreach Task Force that I am co-chairing. As I’ve said before our charter is to study visitors, inactive members and the local community and then to make recommendations on what the church could do to create an atmosphere of hospitality and invitation. It was a good meeting – mainly kept to start up tasks and ideas. We have two challenges. First is scheduling meetings – the folks on the team are really busy and it’s hard to find a 1.5 hour time slot that works for everybody. Fortunately I discovered (after some hints from the pastor and another team member) Meet-O-Matic. That should help. The second challenge is that we have one team member who has no Internet access (or inclination to get access). We’ve appointed a team member to be that member’s “Internet buddy”, and we’ve covenanted not to make any decisions via e-mail without getting her input.
The team is very diverse (as diverse as we could get given the congregation’s demographics). We have people who have only been attending our church since last spring and people who have been members for over 25 years. We have a pretty good age spread, and the gender balance is good. The skills and interests of the group members are fairly well balanced, too.
One interesting concept that came from this meeting is the definition of our “mission field” – the land area that we are targeting. The traditional idea was that we serve a 3 mile radius from the church building. However, over 1/2 of the team lives outside of that radius. This means (by extrapolation – and it does work out that way) that a significant percentage of the church membership drives past another Presbyterian church or three (not to mention other denominations) to get to our church. We are thinking that we might have two tiers – the 3-mile “local” tier and a larger area. We decided to add “active members outside the 3-mile radius” to the list of groups studied to see what draws them to drive a distance to be part of our community. We’re also going to be mapping the households using software yet to be determined (Google Maps?).
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So that was Monday evening. Did I get a break Tuesday evening? No. Carolyn decided that this was the week to re-seal the driveway while it is still warm enough. (It did need it) So I got home Tuesday evening and it took the two of us just about 1 hour to put a coat on the driveway. She was nice to me Wednesday evening and put the 2nd coat on herself (a thinner coat). I just had to cook dinner.
Tonight is laundry, and then Friday evening I’m going with the Sr. Highs up to Camp Johnsonburg for a quick overnight retreat. We’ll be home about 3pm on Saturday – just in time to see Rutgers play Maryland (my brother’s alma mater) in football.
Sunday I’ll have church in the morning. I’m attending an adult forum on what makes Presbyterians different from other denominations. I have homework to do – matching the names, dates, and a short summary of the Confessions. Sunday evening the church is doing the first ever Jazz Vespers. The youth are attending together, and I’m probably going to bring Carolyn along too.
Who was it that said “You can sleep when you’re dead.”?
Church: Getting your money’s worth
This Sunday the congregants at the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville experienced a trifecta of worship events.
It started with a 5 minute plus speech by a member of the Stewardship committee.
Later we followed that up with a baptism.
After the sermon, we had ordination and installations. One elder was recently elected to fill the term of a brand new elder who had to move for his job. Two deacons had been unable to attend the ordination and installation the week after the election back in June – one had to be ordained.
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The staff managed to keep the total time to 1 hour 15 minutes through the creative use of short hymns and short prayers.
After the service a number of us were joking about how we should have added Communion and a Wedding to the service.
In other news: tonight is the first meeting of the Welcome and Outreach Task Force that I’m co-chairing. I have all handouts copied, and I’m just about to send a reminder e-mail. Wish me luck!
Rhythm for the Soul – Jazz Vespers, dinner, and a mini-concert
On Sunday, September 30, 2007, the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville will be holding its first Jazz Vespers service. A flyer can be found HERE.
The evening kicks off at 4pm with the jazz vespers service. Dinner follows at 5pm ($5 donation requested). After dinner there will be a mini-concert at 6pm. The Rev. Bill Carter and Presbybop will be the performers for the concert and will be featured in the service. Presbybop is a jazz quarter made up entirely by Presbyterian clergy.
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All are welcome. Come on down!
Secular Politics and the Church
I’m a bit concerned.
I have said in some places, but perhaps not this blog, something about my feelings on secular politics and the church. The short version is that I feel that the church should teach its members how to make moral judgments, but that the church should NOT be involved in advocating a position on current secular political events. In other words – the church should be for peace, but not for peace in the Middle East by creating a Palestinian state (to give one example). The church is in the field of giving us moral toolkits, but should not be instructing us on exactly how to apply them to specific situations. Otherwise, at some point we stop asking people to make proper personal decisions on secular matters and start dictating those decisions – we create essential tenets that have little to do with God but much to do with the country or world. I know that my opinion is in the minority among church leaders, though I’m not so sure about the pew sitters in general.
My pastor said something in his sermon this past Sunday about the church and politics.
I want to ask us to consider a kind of variation on that Peter Drucker question [mentioned earlier]. To ask whether the business we’re also in as a community of faith is about changing our Common Life … our life together as a people … our participation in the body politic. Does this message have something to say about how we participate in the political realm and in the social realm?
Also, the church has scheduled an event for the church to give their feedback on this issue to our pastor before he delivers a sermon series on the topic.
People to Preacher Symposium on Faith & Politics –
Convener: Jeff Vamos. Two Sections (choose one)
Tuesday, October 30, 6:30-9:00 pm (dinner); or Saturday,
November 3, 9-11:00 am.
What does the Bible say about the relationship between faith and politics? How have Presbyterians dealt with that issue? Is it appropriate to speak of politics from the pulpit? What did Jesus have to say on this? These are questions we will discuss in this symposium. Each one-time conversation is designed to provide Jeff with “grist for the sermon mill” before a twopart sermon series on Faith & Politics in early November.
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Please call the church office, 896-1212 or email office@pclawrenceville.org to register for one of the sessions. Preparatory reading material from the Book of Confessions will be expected.
I don’t think I’m alone – after he made this statement (and a few others) in the sermon the couple sitting next to me got fidgety and wrote a few notes to each other on their bulletin. I got the idea that the pastor’s words made them uncomfortable.
This concerns me because I sense a desire for our church to make more political pronouncements and to become involved in political causes. Other churches do this – some on the left and some on the right.
When I came to Lawrenceville, one of my concerns was the political strife in the church and beyond and the degree to which it would affect me as a member. The church and society as a whole has been polarized into two sides: The Right – evangelical, conservative, fundamentalist, Republican and the Left – progressive, less religious, tolerant, diverse, Democrat. The leaders of government – particularly Republicans – have co-opted the Christian religious establishment as a voting block. I was assured by the Interim Associates for Pastoral Ministry (temporarily filling the Associate Pastor role) that the culture of the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville intentionally chose to embrace members from all parts and ends of the political/religious spectrum. That the congregation was willing to discuss controversial issues openly (as opposed to some congregations that avoid them) but in a manner where all points of view are respected. Discussions, not fights. Very even tempered.
What concerns me is that I based my decision to join this church on many factors, and chief among them was this “Big Tent” philosophy. I know that Jeff Vamos (and apparently Mary Alice Lyman as well) falls on the left end of the political/theological spectrum. The church in general tips towards the left end as well. But there is still a respect for those who disagree, and an unwritten agreement that the congregation as a whole (and the Session too) will not take a corporate position on secular political issues. It is probably impossible to impose a similar moratorium on theological positions, though the church does try to be inclusive of all in at least membership.
So I’m worried. Is the church trying to change in a way that goes against one of the bigger reasons that I chose it? Do we stop being the church where all are welcome and become the Church of the Left? Do I need to leave if that happens?
I have signed up for the “symposium” described above. We’ll have to see where it goes.
Theology on Tap
The Princeton, NJ Nassau and Witherspoon Street Presbyterian churches, the Presbyterian Church of Lawrenceville, and the Princeton Seminary have jointly started a young adult program called “Theology on Tap”. Every 2nd Thursday this fall (and if last night is any indication, it will continue beyond fall) at 8pm young adults gather at the Yankee Doodle Tap Room of the Nassau Inn in Princeton for community and some light theological discussion.
Last night was the first event. I estimate that 20-25 people showed up by the time I left at 9:30 (gotta be at work today). There was a mix of church members, church leaders (clergy and staff), and seminarians plus perhaps one or two “bring a friend” folks. I heard some folks saying that they’d invite friends to the next one, and I know that the postcards (with the image above) were taken to be given out. We may have more people next time. Ages ranged from the low 20’s through me at near 40, to a few who I suspect were older than 40.
Each of us was given an 18oz glass (call it a pint) with the PCUSA logo on one side and “Theology on Tap” on the other. We used them for drinking and were able to take them home. (I’m not clear on whether or not to bring them back for the next meeting.) Only one was broken – my fault – I stood up to let somebody by and the chair hit the table behind me and it tipped and CRASH! Oops.
The meeting organizers bought food for the group, and the rest of us paid for our drinks. I suspect that the glasses were the biggest expense and otherwise this program is pretty inexpensive to run.
After a short introduction of everybody to everybody, we broke into small group and were asked to discuss any burning theological questions. The questions weren’t easy. At my table (from memory, I think I’m missing a few):
- What does Jesus’ death on the cross mean to me?
- Is God still involved in the world today? Does prayer work?
- A brief discussion on the Trinity and the paradox of three-in-one
- A statement on morality and society
- Where do people of other faiths fit into God’s plan and/or salvation?
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As I said – that’s what I remember. I think we covered 6 or 7 just throwing ideas around. The crowd was highly educated on the relevant issues – the few who weren’t ministry professionals or seminary students were highly involved laypeople like me. After the theology the group continued with basic socializing.
For those on Facebook, there is a group for Theology on Tap in Princeton at Theolodoodle.
Now for my personal impressions.
I’m a fairly strong introvert, though I can present a brave face to new people and the less sensitive might not pick me out as an introvert. Because of that, parties (and hanging out at a bar counts) tend to sap my energy. I generally don’t enjoy them. I tend to arrive early and leave early.
Last night was nothing like that. I felt comfortable with the folks that I met and felt that “instantly comfortable” feeling with the new folks that I met. I left at 9:30 not because I wanted to, but because I had to get sleep before going to work today. That’s rare for me – I usually leave because I want to but last night I left because I had to.
The other rare thing is that I liked everybody that I met. That is nearly unique in my experience and it is unique to church-related events (Youth Advisory Delegate events, church camp, and this). I enjoyed meeting Barbara, Kate’s friends Sarah and Sarah (apologies if the spelling is wrong) and Grier at our small table. I enjoyed meeting the others in other groups and next time I’ll make sure to mingle more with people that I don’t know. I was also pleasantly surprised at how well I fit in at almost-40 with the folks from age 23 to slightly-older-than-me.
The theological discussion was also deep and meaningful for its brevity. These folks have actually thought about the questions and have something very real to say. It was all said without judgment of those who hold an alternative view.
I’m 90% sure that I’ll be there for the 3 scheduled meetings to come. I might miss next month because of my schedule. I’m also going to see if Carolyn wants to come.
If you’re in the Princeton area and interested in meeting some great people and talking theology, stop by on the 2nd Thursday starting at 8pm!
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